Greetings!
This
month, my hot pursuit of happiness was tempered by a
harsh dose of reality with the sudden deaths of one dear
family member and two friends in my life. The two men
and one woman, all in their prime, passed on way too
early, leaving all of us to come to terms with our loss,
grief and acutely heightened sense our own mortality.
Both of the men (one a 50 year-old
attorney, the other my 48 year-old neighbor) suddenly
were felled by heart attacks. The third loss was my
beautiful cousin, Beth Block. Beth, just 39, was a
talented fine art photographer who had an international
reputation for her keen eye and sophisticated prints.
She was killed in an automobile accident on April 20.
How do I bear it? How do I teach my
children about this natural, yet supremely painful, part
of living that no one can avoid? How can I continue
embracing life and joy while enduring the flip side,
death and sadness? Confronted with such events, I
questioned the reason for life and railed against the
randomness of it all. In the past weeks, I have
weathered gut-wrenching grief and a depth of darkness I
had never imagined. At first, I judged myself a failure
for not practicing what I, Ms. Happiness
Create-A-Happy-Day, preaches. Then I decided to
surrender to the sadness, trusting that it couldn't go
on forever...nothing can. I found that even my darkness
was still dimly illuminated by the light within that
I've been cultivating over the years. My will to be
happy had taken deep root and remained steadfast despite
the waves of grief that buffeted me. I watched my
children and allowed myself to experience comfort in
their smiles and jokes. I made an effort to see beauty
somewhere in each day and the potential for grace
somewhere in each moment. In grieving, I cried, screamed
and awakened a primal part of myself that I had never
known. Now I accept that it resides alongside my
happiness, but it is my happiness I choose to give the
higher ground. In living through this, I came to a
more heartfelt, less intellectual understanding of why
light cannot exist without dark, nor joy without sorrow,
or life without death. For everything there is a season,
and the season of happiness does return.
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I
had an idea to rearrange and professionally record the
two theme songs generously licensed to the H-Factor project by
composers Danny Peck, who penned Where Is My
Heart?, and James Fuchs, composer of What Is Your
Happiness? Both composers fell in love with
the project and thoroughly embraced the opportunity to
showcase their music. Happiness is infectious and this
project does a good job of proving it!
My
step-daughter, Lara Kamen Fuchs, James' wife recently
founded Nicola Talent Agency and took on our recording
project as her company's first project! Her challenge
was to create a team of musicians and singers to capture
the essence of H-Factor through song.
She put out the word on craigslist.com and we even
received an audition via YouTube! Lara did an
amazing job recruiting 11 singers from every corner of
Los Angeles. They assembled at my home for their first,
and only, rehearsal before the studio
session.
No one knew each other but
everyone had a desire to sing about happiness. After a
few hours of rehearing, the voices that began as random
talent blossomed into a unified blast of joy. The
Happiness Choir had arrived! The following
Saturday, a day before Mother's Day, we recorded at
Universal Music, a decked out production studio with a
very savvy recording staff. Kayla was in her element as
she wooed the sound engineer and took command of the
"Producer's Button" on the control console. We filmed
the progression of the music project from that first
tentative meeting of the singers, their metamorphosis
into a choir, and the energetic, studio recording with
the singers dressed and possessed in their flowing
gospel gowns. After the final take, they broke out in a
boisterous a capela version of What Is Your
Happiness? that moved me to tears (got that on
camera, too). From the bittersweet recognition of my
recent losses to the joy of giving birth to this special
project...what a way to celebrate Mother's
Day! |
 
Happiness Coach Rima Rudner, author of
"Choose to Be Happy: A Guide to Total Happiness" (slated
for publication by Choose Inc. July 2008) was the
featured speaker at the 2008 Sundance Women's Retreat in
Utah on April 19th. The author (first cousin of
comedienne Rita Rudner) talked humorously about her
often tragic life, what she learned from the gobs of
misfortune that bombarded her along the way, how she
triumphed over adversity, and the insights and divine
interventions that drove her to write this book. Rima
explained her Wait 24 Hours Rule, the 15%
Principle and her unique theory that there are two
Gods-one is your own personal Guiding Spirit and the
other a universal Divine or Higher Power. This was
followed by a general discussion about how to stop toxic
people from making you unhappy and how to stay happy in
a chaotic, unstable world. Each woman received a signed
copy of Rima's book and an advance copy of the "Choose
to Be Happy Workbook," featuring self-tests such as What
is Your Happiness Set-Point?, What is Your Happiness
IQ?, and How Much is in Your Happiness Bank?
Later that day, the women were
treated to a private screening of the 30-minute rough of
H-Factor.. Where
is Your Heart? The
audience was intrigued when Rima told them about Lisa's
interviews with prison inmates and the Lady Boys
of Bangkok. Everyone felt that H-Factor was the cherry on top of the "Happiness
Day" cake and many asked where they could buy the film.
Some suggested that H-Factor would make a great Valentines Day gift
tied with ribbons to little heart boxes of dark
chocolates. Hmmm. A delicious idea. Find out more
about Rima's continuing contributions to happiness at http://www.choosetobehappy.net/ or
contact her directly: rima@rimarudner.com. |
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Photography by Rob Szajkowski
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Our
showcase for happiness art created by young students at
the Children's Education Center at Cal Tech in Pasadena.
We welcome your artistic expression of happiness.
We'll gladly feature your H-Art print in an
upcoming issue.
Craig
6 years
old
"My Cat"
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"It takes courage to push yourself to
places that you have never been before...
To test
your limits...To break through barriers...
And the
day came when the risk it took to remain inside the bud
was more painful than the risk it took to
blossom"
Anais Nin's words above remind me of the
stretch I have taken out of my own comfort zone to
become a filmmaker.
As I watch my daughter
Kayla's evolution and her struggle to comprehend and
accept the recent deaths of a family member and friend,
I see just how vital the role of pain is in our
lives. Without it we become complacent, too hesitant to
push out of the protected bud toward our blossoming.
Time to Spring forward, welcome Summer, and
remember to frolic!
With heart,
Lisa, Kayla, Aryel
Kamen and the staff of H-Factor...Where is Your
Heart?
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Yesterday,
I discovered that the bottle caps of the ice tea that me and
my mom drink have quotations in them.
This is what I
found in my peppermint herbal tea:
"Happiness is when
what you think, what you say, and what you do are in
harmony."
That's what Mahatma Gandhi said and it makes
sense to
me!
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Click the image above
for a sneak peek!
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We'll fill you in on Lisa
adventure to Croatia in the next issue
of "Happiness Headlines"
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4th European Conference on Positive Psychology
(ECPP), July 2008
Come learn, teach, and enjoy old and new
friends at this international exchange of positive ideas in
the beautiful city of Opatija, Croatia, nestled on the shores
of the Adriatic Sea. H-Factor
will screen for attendees at the Welcome Reception.
Speakers include Ed Diener, University of Illinois at
Urbana-Champaign; Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, Claremont Graduate
University; Randy Larsen, Washington University at St. Louis;
Alan Carr, University College Dublin, Ireland; Wilmar
Schaufeli of Netherland's Utrecht University; and Márta Fülöp
of the Hungarian Academy of Sciences. For more
information, visit www.pospsy.ffri.hr/ <http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?t=apl58ncab.0.0.j4y7qecab.0&ts=S0329&p=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.pospsy.ffri.hr%2F&id=preview>
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Written and edited by
Rachel Ross
H-Factor's Content Development
Specialist
& Resident Skeptic
Designed by
Dustin Zahn
Dzahn Design
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